When my wife asks me, "Guess what happened at work today?" Instead of simply answering, "What?" ...I like to actually "guess" what happened by responding with oddities, like, “Oh no! Was your friend eaten by a giant, rabid kangaroo?
Sadly, the stories never involve a kangaroo or anything rabid, but even as she tells me the actual, true anecdote ....I continue generating the fantasy in my head ----- like a giant, mouth-foaming kangaroo busted down her office door and pounced on her co-worker and eats her. And what it can’t stuff in its mouth, it puts in pouch and hops away for a bedtime snack.
Then I’m usually rudely interrupted with the “Are you even listening to me” look from her concerned eyes…..so, I pause….and attempt to muster up something that I had grabbed from her story while I was daydreaming, but I still keep thinking about that damn Kangaroo. So, as far as I know, a giant rabid kangaroo DID wreak havoc somewhere…and is still lurking in the shadows behind its next victim. Some call it A.D.D., I call it “imagination.” :)
9 months later…….I was born unto the world.
Life was rough for young James Patrick, the Unigod, as the other Unicorn’s did not let him play in their Unicorn games. So he decided to set out on his own to find Castle Greyskull for guidance. At the gates, he was confronted by Papa Smurf and Gizmo and was told that their master was not home, but that he could seek guidance from The Princess of Power……..She-Ra.
She-Ra showed young JP all the wisdom and physical capabilities he would need to succeed in the world. She then transferred him to Peekablue for more physical training…….Much more physical training. From there, his training shifted to Mermista, then to Frosta, Flutterina, and Florence Henderson.
How JP actually ventured into the radio business is still a mystery. Some say that he lost all his magical powers when he wagered & lost them in a game of Old-Maid. Some say that he drank away all his powers, others suggest that he rode in from the sunset on the shoulders of a sasquatch to the ROCK 108 studios. The full truth may never be known. All that we do know is that he was forced to work on planet Earth and if you get him drunk enough, he will tell you the painful, physical, sexual stories that commenced in Castle Greyskull.
You may be wondering at this point of my story, “Where is his Unicorn’s horn?” All we can say is that it’s clearly not on his forehead.
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