6-3-25 Top 5 Stupid Summer Sports To Get Your Kids Into

Who used all the Wi-Fi?

Ah, apartment life.

Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.

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Sometimes

you jump the gun sometimes you got a snake that's biting you right in between the legs Welcome aboard Tom Garland.

Thank you.

Good morning, Brian

So, here we are on a Top 5 Tuesday.

You start off the Top 5 Tuesday by bringing us your Top 5 with comedy.

Later in the show, Russ will bring me a Top 5, and I have to guess certain things, whether it's rock music, it's geography, it's food.

It's a way for him to embarrass me.

the lack of my knowledge.

That is payback for your brain buster, Brian.

You embarrassed the

entire

rock 108 nation.

You are not wrong.

Make us all feel stupid every morning.

It's all right.

At least it's only on Tuesdays.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So a little payback.

That's all right.

There we go.

What do you got for a top five today?

Well, speaking of embarrassing it right now is the time of year.

Like summer sports are starting up for kids and you know, like if you've got kids, you're always out of these baseball games and all this.

And you know, you

Kids are sweating they don't even know how to play these games and you know you got the t-ball kid who's just digging in the dirt What is the point of this so I have decided that if the kids are gonna play stupid sports Then let's make them really stupid.

So this is the top five Stupid summer sports for your kids to play.

All right number five frisbee golf

but with Tupperware lids.

Why buy a disc when mom's cabinet has 30 unmatched lids?

Is that where they went?

Yeah, you just toss those, hit your brother, aim for the dog bowl.

Yes.

Number four, neighborhood hide and seek with no one seeking.

Yeah, the kids hide, no one looks.

After 45 minutes, one kid joins a family of raccoons.

One

kid is

halfway to Canada.

Do you win if you get an Amber Alert?

When everyone's phone is like...

We

can't find Timmy!

That's when you know the game is over.

Send the drones.

Number three, competitive grass growing.

The kids just sit and stare at the lawn, no blinking, no snacks, and the winner gets a sunburn.

I don't know.

None of these, these jokes aren't all winners either.

These are stupid summer sports for your kids to play.

Number two, backyard parkour in flip flops.

Yes.

Now one sponsored by both Mercy Hospital and St.

Luke's emergency

room.

Don't forget the, uh, the small town little location too.

You know, like farmer John's, uh,

You want to put some glue on that?

Okay, let's move on.

Number one.

This is the number one stupid summer sports for your kids to play.

Number one, kiddie pool UFC match.

Load them up on sugar, put them in the kiddie pool and teach them violence.

They cry, you take a picture, America wins.

Get him set up just the right way.

Yeah, maybe someday you'll be in the octagon the five-star frog splash Tom Garland has not only a movie out there that he produced he

What's the filmmaker of that movie is called?

That's called the arcade gamer.

The

true story.

That's the true story of local arcade legend and really worldwide arcade legend, Jordan Dorenton, who plays Gallagher and wins the Gallagher world record and like the old 1980 something Gallagher video game.

And then later goes to try his luck at Donkey Kong.

So that movie is out on Amazon and that's on to be and you can watch it for free on to be your stand up special is also

available.

Yeah.

Standup special on to be absolutely free.

It's called Tom Garland selling out.

I'm surprised you didn't mention pickleball in this particular sports.

It's a stupid sport.

But hey, if you can get drunk doing it and then go upstairs and play some duck pin bowling, maybe it's not such a bad idea.

That's not for the kids.

That's for you out

there.

One nation.

Cold stupid girl.

The Rock Wanna Wait Morning Show.

Who used all the Wi-Fi?

Ah, apartment life.

Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.

Maybe 2027 deserves an upgrade.

Coming August 2027, Four Lakes Properties introduces the brand new Union Station Apartments.

Furnished, in-unit washer and dryer, internet included, a great central downtown location, one to five bedroom apartments, and no double occupancy fees.

That's less adulting and more actually enjoying where you live.

Union Station Apartments, now leasing from Four Lakes Properties.

We have a washer and dryer in the apartment?

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Papa Roach and their latest even if it kills me on rock 108 storms are likely today Looks like that those will be moving further south but a high of 80 and then tomorrow partly cloudy skies 77 Thursday slight chance of storms later in the day and also 77 Comedian Tom Garland is here Tom.

Uh, you think you got it bad today?

I'm ready for this one hit me with it.

All right, so you think you got it bad

Tom here's the thing is a man in Thailand sent to the hospital after he was in his bathroom Could be a myriad of things going on inside the bathroom.

Yes in Thailand.

Yes Man was left fighting for his life after suffering severe blood loss when a python Bid him on the tip of his genitals while he was sitting on the toilet.

Oh my god.

Yes

Uh, here's, here's his name, Tom.

If you want to take a run at trying to pronounce that name right there.

I don't think

I can say this on the radio.

If I say it quickly, maybe.

Athaporn is his, Athaporn is his first name.

Uh, Boonmachwai?

Boonmachwai?

I love

that

you- Athaporn Boonmachwai?

Yeah, I love that you took a run

at that.

I tried.

I

mean

that's the sound you make when the snake bites you in the junk

he's 38 he was attacked by the large snake at the bathroom of his home in the province east of Bangkok according to the reports he reached down after feeling a sudden sharp pain only to find the pythons jaws clamped on to the tip can you imagine trying to call into

work

After that, like... Well, Johnson, I

mean,

Athoporn, why can't you come in?

You're like, well, it's really personal.

I can't really...

This continues.

Athoporn called out for his wife and struggled to free himself from the grip of the 11-foot serpent.

People pay money for this.

I think I would, I'm not a big Yelp review guy.

I think I would write my first Yelp review to my landlord.

I

would be like, boom a twi property management is out of control.

An 11 foot python in your toilet.

An 11 foot python bit my...

Like junk.

Yes.

And now a

snake bit my

snake.

They still won't give me my deposit back.

And my

boss wants me to come in at noon for some reason.

The blood loss because the snake bit him.

After that, somehow he managed to tie a rope around the snake's head to secure it to the bathroom door to prevent the snake from escaping.

Oh,

the snake.

Not his snake.

That's how they got it off, like when you pull a child's tooth.

Like when you tie the string to the tooth and then you slam a door.

That was on him for a while if they had to get the rope out.

Yeah, emergency services quickly responded and transported him to the hospital where he was treated for significant blood loss.

Imagine that you're the EMT walking in on that scene.

Yeah.

Guess I'm gonna go there.

I guess if like being treated for blood loss still beats being treated for dick loss.

Yes, you know Tom Garland has his top five coming up

and watch out for snakes my friends you think you got it bad it